The flight to New York...

So I made the stand by list! I was on the earlier flight out of DFW bound for JFK! One of the flight attendants was a little too rough while re-arranging the overhead bin and dropped a bag on someone’s head! Now we have an ice-pack, a couple of people in suits and a very pissed off uppity lady with a headache. This single act delays the flight by an hour and fifteen minutes. Sheesh! There were people who were trying to connect for a flight to Rome who were surely gonna miss their connections. I just sat back and watched it all thanking God I didn’t have a connection.
Have you ever wondered why all the coughing and sneezing on a plane? What is the deal with that? None of these people sounded ill while we all sat together in the terminal. Anyway, I’m older and overflowing with phobias, paranoias and psychoses so all this coughing is really starting to get to me. About the time I go into full on panic mode, the considerate passenger in front of me decides to recline his seat and spend the rest of the flight in my lap. Oh yes, thanks buddy. Now I’m not worried about all the coughing and sneezing. I’m worried cause I can’t move my legs! I take a few deep breaths and just close my eyes. What choice do I have? Thanks to passenger 35G, I will opt for the emergency exit row from now on!
We land at JFK (not soon enough) . 35G is fresh as a daisy, stretching and gathering his belongings. Once the blood returns to the lower half of my body, I can do the same. I decide that in addition to the emergency row aisle thing, I also need to lose a bit of weight! As I walk through JFK, I read the sign that says “Welcome to New York” I think, “weird, I’m in New York.”
One of my bags is also in New York. The other one, who knows? I make my way to the Baggage Information area only to be assured that my bag is indeed NOT in New York. Oh, Thanks so much! You’ve been very helpful! I got a phone number and hopefully it will arrive on the later flight. I will absolutely WHIG out if it’s not. I have 90 pounds worth of supplies in that bag! But my legs are still a little numb and I don’t have the energy to whig out now, it can wait til tomorrow.